Should i get married?

[TenSanYi]

I am only 26years old this year but my Gf is a msian 2 year older than me, we have been relationship for 2 years and she want to get married asap and I really love her.

The problem is I am a low income earner and currently my job is unstable might face dismissal anytime (due to did not achieve company sales target), further more I required to foot a high amount of bill need to be pay monthly include supporting my mother. Good potential jobs opportunity are very rare nowadays and my qualification isn't high. she is only holding a work permit working as a retails and doesn't earn much as well..

My gf is not ugly but I am ugly and fat, she even doesn't mind I am poor. Some time I am really very worried that I am unable to support her and might drag her down with me. I know that I am still young but I think she is kinda rush on this and probably might leave me if I were to delay our marriage.

I am feeling very guilty and stressful about this issues for the past 3 months and really hasn't been sleeping well.

Please kindly try not to flame me, I am just another stressful Singaporean

[Ken79]

TS bro, the worst thing to do is rejecting her and not giving her any specific reasons.
You should tell her all your concerns and worries that u mentioned here, let her weight the situation and decide does she still dare to marry u and go through this together or leave u.

But i assume she's serious about the r/s, u guys should plot a road map of career path first, towards financial stability.
How to upgrade yourselves through courses, after which change jobs with better prospects, how long u allow yourselves to achieve this.
I would assume 2-3 years as a realistic timeline.

After which then talk about marriage which is going to involve a lot of money, so better do something about your income first in order not to have so much problems in the long run, buy house, renovate, kids, aging parents are all serious expenditures.

[topcook1]

The answer is no if you not ready . You must be mentally prepare she will break off with you .

[mevius]

Go with ur feelings bro , maybe can go rom first ??

[diputs1269]

TS painted a picture of having financial, no job prospect and bleak future.
Furthermore not nice looking and your girlfriend is older, facing with
multiple problems yet she wants to marry you?
Sorry to say that she is attracted to your Singapore citizenship
therefore you should not marry! Reason being not compatible

[jnudes]

Just remain single. No point to proceed due to financial worries. Like what other bro said is the SG citizenship she is eyeing for. Ask yourself is she really genuine? She still want to be with you although you are fat and ugly. What is she up to? Better break and remain friends with her.

[Ho-Lee]

Ok just ask her if she mind going for traditional marriage in Malaysia but no signing on legal papers.Lots of couples did this there too. See what she says.

[sbclove69]

I agree with Bro Ken79.

Another factor to consider she is 28 already. Women at that age like to settle down before hitting 30. She might also be worried that if you guys drag on for a few more years and you eventually break off, she is past the magical number of 30.

So take Bro Ken79 advise and sit down discuss with her your worries as well as listen to hers.

[TenSanYi]

I did share with her my problem and concerns and she do understand about it. Presently I am taking my part time study in Dip which is one of the reason for my monthly bills although I really want to take up a Degree asap but financial wise is very unstable.

Originally Posted by Ken79

TS bro, the worst thing to do is rejecting her and not giving her any specific reasons.
You should tell her all your concerns and worries that u mentioned here, let her weight the situation and decide does she still dare to marry u and go through this together or leave u.

But i assume she's serious about the r/s, u guys should plot a road map of career path first, towards financial stability.
How to upgrade yourselves through courses, after which change jobs with better prospects, how long u allow yourselves to achieve this.
I would assume 2-3 years as a realistic timeline.

After which then talk about marriage which is going to involve a lot of money, so better do something about your income first in order not to have so much problems in the long run, buy house, renovate, kids, aging parents are all serious expenditures.

[TenSanYi]

Eh bro, she got other Sinkies guy wanna woo her as well lei... somemore financial wise much strong than me.. so I don't think is really about Singapore citizenship bah??

Originally Posted by diputs1269

TS painted a picture of having financial, no job prospect and bleak future.
Furthermore not nice looking and your girlfriend is older, facing with
multiple problems yet she wants to marry you?
Sorry to say that she is attracted to your Singapore citizenship
therefore you should not marry! Reason being not compatible

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Originally Posted by TenSanYi

Eh bro, she got other Sinkies guy wanna woo her as well lei... somemore financial wise much strong than me.. so I don't think is really about Singapore citizenship bah??

Ever tot if she was wif u, she'll be in CONTROL but wif those more financially sound guys, she'll be CONTROLLED

[Mr_don_juan]

Originally Posted by TenSanYi

I am only 26years old this year but my Gf is a msian 2 year older than me, we have been relationship for 2 years and she want to get married asap and I really love her.

The problem is I am a low income earner and currently my job is unstable might face dismissal anytime (due to did not achieve company sales target), further more I required to foot a high amount of bill need to be pay monthly include supporting my mother. Good potential jobs opportunity are very rare nowadays and my qualification isn't high. she is only holding a work permit working as a retails and doesn't earn much as well..

My gf is not ugly but I am ugly and fat, she even doesn't mind I am poor. Some time I am really very worried that I am unable to support her and might drag her down with me. I know that I am still young but I think she is kinda rush on this and probably might leave me if I were to delay our marriage.

I am feeling very guilty and stressful about this issues for the past 3 months and really hasn't been sleeping well.

Please kindly try not to flame me, I am just another stressful Singaporean

You be taking the biggest risk and commit to a girl whom you be betting on will be the love of your life for the rest of your life. Marriage is about wanting kids, which perpetuates the human race and helps in increasing our poor nation birthrate. In order to raise a child, you need to work harder and progress well in your work together as one. Both of you will need to bear responsibilites and be committed in creating a family of your own.

So it's a personal choice, noone can tell you whether it's wrong or if it's right for you. It's like lottery sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Just make sure that the girl you are going to marry, is the girl you truly want to be with for the rest of your life. And you will have to get along very well with her parents.

It’s all on you bro. You are ultimately responsible for all things that happen to you. Stay unmarried until you are sure that you want babies. Do everything you want to do first and enjoy your life, improve your career etc, just my 2 cents worth

[diputs1269]

Originally Posted by TenSanYi

Eh bro, she got other Sinkies guy wanna woo her as well lei... somemore financial wise much strong than me.. so I don't think is really about Singapore citizenship bah??

Have you ever ponder and ask her why the sudden rush to get married,
if she knows of your financial burden. Supposing if both of you get married,
you think how long can you sustain your marriage if you lose your job?
Hope that day will never come or happen.

Fate will decide whether you can be with her or not.

[xpinkyx-moment]

I guess u two can set a date , and start planning future ,set a goal , and work together to archive .
Let her know what you think , talk to her. Sit down and Discuss .

as Letting her wait endlessly for an ans , will let you two have pressures .

As you said , you are not good looking , and poor , I believe she loves u is not base on ur money/look/citizenship . So I believe she is someone u should treasure la .

If really not compatible , I think you know what I mean la ..

[wells]

like one bro mentioned, ROM first. keep cost low...then plan wedding dinner once you got your budget. plan step by step la and stable your career first.

still the same word, "if she yours she yours".