What is your (future)burden in life?

[mortar]

Hi bros,

I have been thinking of starting this thread months ago, and i finally decided to sit down and write about things going on in my life, and hopefully i can find some inspiration along the way.

I am a 22yrs old guy, having a job with pay of 1.8k which i use to give some to parents, on expenditure and save up more than half of it for my sch fees.

In my family of 4, only me and my dad are working, earning not that much but still can sustain the family up till now. However he is getting old (reaching 60 soon) and can see that he is growing weaker as the years go by. Mum has been a housewife since i was born, and i have a sister which is a ite dropout and is jobless.

Over the months i have been thinking about my future.. in a few yrs time, dad might be jobless and hence, everyone in the family except me is jobless, i ain't earning much and i am also saving up for my future, but i can see that my family will be a burden.. Parents have very little saving and I will have to support them somewhat no matter what.

I am not 'hating' them to be a burden to me, but is just sad about this thing. When i see my close friends going oversea uni, going oversea trips for holiday(my only chance to go overseas is during army days), drive cars around and don't even have to think about their future burden, it gets quite depressing. I wouldn't say life is unfair as i have loving parents, just that my life is less luxuriant than others.. and i must work harder in life to achieve what some people already have..

So people, share you burden or something that is drawing u back from your dreams

[xyman]

I start work later than you, 26, 27 like that, and earn 1,500.. Got back 1,200 after cpf....feel miserable and got laugh by my friends ... Now my life is better financially...

You are still young, start a part time degree or diploma course.. It won't make you rich but it will at least upgrade your current skills and salary level.. We are not born with with a silver spoon.... We will need to take a longer route...

Happiness is what you have inside you and not what you have in material sense... Many people are rich but they are just walking zombies deprive of feelings.

How many times I look at rich and reputable people and I think they are missing out the best part of life....to me,able to bonkers everyday and with different woman is the best thing in life, how many scholars or government servants or reputable people can do this, they can only envy us secretly in their hearts. Haha

Originally Posted by mortar

Hi bros,

I have been thinking of starting this thread months ago, and i finally decided to sit down

So people, share you burden or something that is drawing u back from your dreams

[BigBoy2]

Dear TS,

Do not give up hope, as what Bro xyman said, you could always do part time courses and try to upgrade yourself and also at the same time your pay.

Though I am getting much more then you are now but you have something I do not have, that is you are still very young.

With positive think I think you would be able to go far.... Do not waver in your thoughts and dream.... It will come true one day press on and perserve..... Just a note I have had got no holidays for the past 10 years now. It's not the $$ thing but time and commitment thing.

Good luck and be positive.

[marker75]

Originally Posted by mortar

Hi bros,

I have been thinking of starting this thread months ago, and i finally decided to sit down and write about things going on in my life, and hopefully i can .........So people, share you burden or something that is drawing u back from your dreams

bro, honestly being happy at the job is more important than monetary rewards. however, there are really tonnes of opportunites out there. it is not about if you are qualified, its about if you are really willing to work to get the monies...

i personally have friends took jobs/work 10 years back as insurance agents. while many people shun such "financial planners", my friend worked hard. suffered for 6months with pay like 1k+. guess what, 3 years down the road he was earning 300k per yr. and the last i met him 2 mths ago he owns 3 condos (1 fully paid), 2 cars (1 bm and 1 jap family car both fully paid) and he already became an agency senior manager grossing slightly more than 1mil per year. mind you, he didnt even try pushing sales to friends...

the best part is the whole group of us are U grads and he didnt even ever had to use his degree. all he need was o-levels for the job.

the whole point is if you really want to make money, be open to all trades. insurance, property or whatever. as long as there is a variable component in the remuneration, there are ways for you to earn. the question is, do you REALLY WANT to earn such monies? can you suffer what others avoid?

i personally know of so many people that made it cos they dare to try.

....do you DARE?...

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

Originally Posted by mortar

..... i am also saving up for my future, but i can see that my family will be a burden.. Parents have very little saving and I will have to support them somewhat no matter what.

I am not 'hating' them to be a burden to me, but is just sad about this thing. When i see my close friends going oversea uni, going oversea trips for holiday(my only chance to go overseas is during army days), drive cars around and don't even have to think about their future burden, it gets quite depressing. I wouldn't say life is unfair as i have loving parents, just that my life is less luxuriant than others.. and i must work harder in life to achieve what some people already have.....something that is drawing u back from your dreams

The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is YOU.

Do Not Ever Never Say That Your Family Will Be A Burden Because It is Better Never To Have Met Them In Your Dream Than To Wake And Reach For The Hands That Are Not There Anymore......Cherish What Your Are Having Now, Do Not Spoil What You Have By Desiring What You Have Not. Remember That What You Now Have Was Once Among The Things You Only Hoped For.

Please ponder on above!!! Don't worry and work towards your dreams whatever they may be. Cheers

[miloluv]

I can understand how you feel at this stage of life.. I mean it is normal to think about it, I started off earning 1.5k, no car no house, basic necessities were met but not luxury kind of lifestyle. Barely can save much after giving parents a portion as what a responsible son would do.

At that point of time, friends were more or less starting out same as me. Then a couple of years down the road, job hop to a higher paying job (a couple hundred higher) and company requested me get a car for work with allowance.

As friends started to upgrade doing part-time degree, I did not, partly due to me not as academic inclined as others, I still have the believe in myself that I can progress further in career.

As I strived on changing another few jobs while discovering what my field of interest are, financially started to get better, and comes with greater responsibilities as well. With dad unemployed for years, mum still struggling with freelance job (semi-retired), there was not much choice who else can shoulder the heavy load of paying for the HDB (nobody else has cpf) as I decided to take up this new role (I was only in my mid-20s).

After few changes of jobs and reaching late 20s, friends were flying high and gap widens with their degrees (Believed they earning much more than I did by then). Now just stepping into early 30s, still struggling with loans and not that financially stable yet (parents already into 60s).

Just like you, if any unforeseen circumstances happening to them, I will have a tough situation on my hands. You may think if I save up throughout the years, yes I did as I'm a thrifty person. It was cruelly wipe out in 2006 when I was retrenched and jobless for a few months to sustain car and house (Never took a single cent from family).

When I was back up on my feet again in 2007, I was layoff again during the worst economic crisis in 2008. Those were the darkest days of my life with savings almost dried up and still without any direction, finally a glimmer of hope appear to get me back up in 2010.

Although I won't say I am maxing my earning potential now, everything is just enough to cover with little savings left. It can be depressing when you are in 30s and just barely make ends meet, while watching own friends flying high, driving Beemers, in glamorous careers, owning their own part time biz.

But one day I was "woken" up by what a friend told me.
He asked me, "how much is actually enough",
"how do we know how hard they have to struggle and sacrifices to live the kind of lifestyle? "And what craps and behind-the-scenes they have to take where none of us know?"
"What makes us think that they are happy being well-off and no problems?"
The key word that knocked my mind was "Being contented"
It brought a smile to my face, although it's tough now, but I'm not complaining and my parents are healthy and alive which I thank god.

Pls do not ever think that they are a burden to you, I can assured you they have never think that way about you since raising you up. Be assured that they would be the last persons standing by you if your world ever collapse. This is another thought that brought me sense of security no one ever will, because these are something so precious that no monetary gains would be able to exchange (the power of love parents have for you).

I wish you have a bright future ahead and do make some plans and lastly ask yourself.. "how much is actually enough?" "Be contented" would be the key word you have to define. Pardon me for being long winded.

Originally Posted by mortar

Hi bros,

I have been thinking of starting this thread months ago, and i finally decided to sit down and write about things going on in my life, and hopefully i can find some inspiration along the way.

I am a 22yrs old guy, having a job with pay of 1.8k which i use to give some to parents, on expenditure and save up more than half of it for my sch fees.

In my family of 4, only me and my dad are working, earning not that much but still can sustain the family up till now. However he is getting old (reaching 60 soon) and can see that he is growing weaker as the years go by. Mum has been a housewife since i was born, and i have a sister which is a ite dropout and is jobless.

Over the months i have been thinking about my future.. in a few yrs time, dad might be jobless and hence, everyone in the family except me is jobless, i ain't earning much and i am also saving up for my future, but i can see that my family will be a burden.. Parents have very little saving and I will have to support them somewhat no matter what.

I am not 'hating' them to be a burden to me, but is just sad about this thing. When i see my close friends going oversea uni, going oversea trips for holiday(my only chance to go overseas is during army days), drive cars around and don't even have to think about their future burden, it gets quite depressing. I wouldn't say life is unfair as i have loving parents, just that my life is less luxuriant than others.. and i must work harder in life to achieve what some people already have..

So people, share you burden or something that is drawing u back from your dreams

[miloluv]

Thanks for the inspiration and hope... I shall draw my mental strength upon this. Sometimes it seems a miracle when a stranger not related in anyway keeping me afloat in life.. Bless you always

Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki

The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is YOU.

Do Not Ever Never Say That Your Family Will Be A Burden Because It is Better Never To Have Met Them In Your Dream Than To Wake And Reach For The Hands That Are Not There Anymore......Cherish What Your Are Having Now, Do Not Spoil What You Have By Desiring What You Have Not. Remember That What You Now Have Was Once Among The Things You Only Hoped For.

Please ponder on above!!! Don't worry and work towards your dreams whatever they may be. Cheers

[AD101]

Dear TS,
Don't worry about too much. it is important that you have the sanity to standup and logicalise your situation. Make do with your current situation but never relent in looking out for opportunities to do better.
Just a little sharing. I am now in my mid-30s. Lost everything, house, car, job, family and now facing mounting debt (all because of a silly relationship that gave me hope and destroyed my life). Now I am starting from scratch, all alone, no family and no friends. Is it tough... damn hell it is. Though I sometimes cry myself to sleep... but what to do... unless I really intend to give in to these setbacks and call it quits with life. I still need to face up and begin again.
I trust you will be able to do the same. Just remember, your family is still with you. They should be your driving force for a better tomorrow. They will be your pillar of strength when you are tired and weary. Just look at their happy faces and all weariness will disappear. Just hear their laughter and you will be energised. Take care.
And just a word of advice... don't get into a relationship unless you are financially stable.
Good luck.

[RoverX]

TS, how you want to live your life is your choice. You are only 22, there is a long road ahead. You should be glad you are born physical able and have a complete family. When you look at others that are materially better off that you, there is always a tinge of jealousy. What about those that are worse off than you, have you thought of that?

I agree with Miloluv……What is enough? Will it make you happier? I know of a local billionare whose daughter is involved in drugs. Is he happier? I believe that what is not earned, you will not appreciate it. What you earn through sweat and tears, you will treasure it no matter how small it may be.

So instead of willowing in self pity, you should decide how you want your future to be and live towards it. I recommend you the book “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” by Robert K. Hopefully, you will see light at the end of the tunnel. Jia you….

[NewMike1304k]

I agree with Bro Ichigo, never think of your parents as burden. Because they brought you up. Everyone has to start from somewhere. Not all have golden spoons in their mouths. But you have a chance to go forward to gain more knowledge, experience and so on. So use it well, save as much as you can for your future and never look at any one else and be envious. Strive to be equal. I wish you luck.

[Strawberry]

Dear TS

I do know how it feel inside you but you have to stay positive and strong in life. There are many ups and down in life but never say give up and that will make you stronger. Always have a goal in life and move towards them... When you have achieve that goal, you will be proud of yourself. But remember never to give up even when you have fail afew times. Pick those failed mission as a learning lesson and move forward again. It is not easy but it is never hard. JUST DO IT...

[K9696]

Originally Posted by mortar

Hi bros,

I have been thinking of starting this thread months ago, and i finally decided to sit down and write about things going on in my life, and hopefully i can find some inspiration along the way.

I am a 22yrs old guy, having a job with pay of 1.8k which i use to give some to parents, on expenditure and save up more than half of it for my sch fees.

In my family of 4, only me and my dad are working, earning not that much but
I am not So people, share you burden or something that is drawing u back from your dreams

Hi TS.. Let me give u my story.. maybe will give you more enlightenment

1) When I was Secondary school, i had to do part time during school holidays because I had a gambler father and owe AHLONG monies. The monies that I earned - $18 per day during 28yrs ago.
Can you imagine that we always wake up 2-3am to entertain those AL who knocked our doors and paste notice in the lift.

2) After that, in Pre-U, same thing happen in my family and thing never change, I had 1 elder brother(1yr my senior who is polio) and 1 younger brother(who is 8yrs my junior). Same old things holidays working to help out in the family expense. The shameful dad never learnt his lesson, go to relative to borrow monies... cos us very embarrass and every CNY, we dare not go to relative for visiting except my Grandma..
>> During my pre-u life, I got 1 good classmate - family is considered well off, so he always bought me lunch, brought me to cinema etc.. (from the bottom of my heart, he was a good buddy to me).

3) Enlisted to NS.. my younger brother Pre-U school fee was paid by me, during my time - my army pay was about $350 (cos I am CPL in mechanic, so vocation pay was high), so can manage to pay his studies till he completed his course.

4) Now I entered into society to work, $700 per month for a start cos I only completed Pre-U and no chance to go into Uni. My dad has never changed, run away and then came back and run away.. all this was a nightmare to the family..(I sympathy my mum who suffer so much cos of him, saving gone for good and also we borrowed from others need to settle cos of my dad)

5) Turn to my elder brother, though polio, he also learnt gambler etc.. and guess what.. Ah Longs also borrow him monies! (What is this world now? how could they do this to a polio who dun have work at all), So my dad help him to settle his debts until both also run away from the family.. left 3 of us to suffer.

TS, do you think life is fair? do you think I should give up? do you think I should put the blame on my dad or my mum or who? BTW, he passed away suddenly due to lung problem - few yrs ago,, even then after he passed away for half yr, 1 LOAN shark man came to knock on my door one afternn, and I shown him his - Altar, then he left...

Now I am in my forties, single, been working with a firm more than 15yrs, my boss (Nihonjin) is treating me very well cos I work hard, put in effort and show my ability to work and they appreciate it. Now he entrusted the part of the operation to me and he hardly visit singapore and only he entrust another GM to visit sin on behalf of him every other month. now my mum is working to kill her time and I still support the family at ease, given my mum holidays for the past 2 years, to Japan/ Taiwan/ Hongkong and China

Maybe you should just continue to do what you need to do, upgrade yourself and continue to look for opportunities, keep saving your monies, no need to follow the techology trend or buying trendy things, I dun enjoy during my 20's and 30's cos I do not have any monies to buy at all, can only envy. But life goes On...

I do not know whether my story will inspire you to do more and save more and dun be silly to believe those FLs - they bring you to nowhere instead you would get burnt. (cos I got burnt before very badly, so learnt my lesson well)

Yes some bro said, only get to know girl friend when u r ready and have stable financially.

Never borrow monies for gambling this is for sure and even u have monies also dun do it, 家破人亡! 十赌九输,赌徒通常没有好的下场,
我们2个"综合娱乐场" 真的感叹会造成社会不晓得接下来会是怎么样!

Take care..

[xyman]

To TS, everyone have their up and down, just take each step in life cherishing what you have now. Dare to dream because with dreams, you can put it into actions and realize it. But do not stray from the right path, one wrong step is all that needs to mess up your life.

Like what the bro say, you are still young....

Originally Posted by miloluv

Thanks for the inspiration and hope... I shall draw my mental strength upon this. Sometimes it seems a miracle when a stranger not related in anyway keeping me afloat in life.. Bless you always

[homeboy2010]

Originally Posted by K9696

dun be silly to believe those FLs - they bring you to nowhere instead you would get burnt.
(cos I got burnt before very badly, so learnt my lesson well)

Yes some bro said, only get to know girl friend
when u r ready and have stable financially.

Never borrow monies for gambling this is
for sure and even u have monies also dun do it,
家破人亡! 十赌九输,赌徒通常没有好的下场,
我们2个"综合娱乐场" 真的感叹会造成社会
不晓得接下来会是怎么样!

Take care..

learn from our Bro here !

[alan0338]

知足常乐 la, the more u see others living good, the more u will feel bad about ur own life if u compare to others,

while u see others leading a good and happy life, but it may not ncessary be the fact cos they not be as happy as u are.
so treasure whatever u have and lead a happy life, u still have a long way to go...