[cherielady]

Hi everyone, to begin with... I am a woman who just registered on this site to post this thread. I have been reading this forum on and off but only lately do I feel that perhaps the guys (or gals) here can help me.

I am married for 4 years, my husband loves me and we enjoy each other's company. Of course there are the usual quarrels and arguments that all couples have. We have no kids (yet). We are perhaps the typical Singaporean couple who work every weekday and spend the weekend doing household chores, groceries, movies...etc.

My problem is that we hardly have sex anymore. We used to do it 3-4 times a week when we were dating, then gradually become once a week after marriage because we were both tired from work. But now it is like once a month? I don't even remember when was the last time, maybe last month.

I am getting upset because I wonder if it is because he don't love me anymore, or is it that he is not interested sexually anymore? I am sure he is not getting it elsewhere. He just concentrates on his iphone games a lot when he's home... we can both be lying on the bed and he will just play his games and I'll watch my videos. I mean, I don't mind this but isn't it normal for couples to want to make love at least once a week or something.

I keep reading here in the forum that men needs sex and often it is the wife who refuses. How I envy those wives whose husbands can't get enough of them. Maybe because I am unattractive to him now? I am not exactly drop dead gorgeous but I'm working on it - trying to exercise regularly and wear better nightwear.

Nowadays on weekends, he will be hard in the morning as usual but it goes off very fast. I try to touch him (is this not an obvious sign that I want to make love???) but he doesn't jump on me like he used to. When we DO make love, he comes quite fast because it has been like AGES since the last time.

I feel embarrased to say this but I have even resorted to masturbating while he was sleeping. This is not the sex life I envisoned... I am not like super high sex drive or expect a lot but isn't this ridiculous.

Sorry for ranting, I can't share my problem with my friends because this is embarrassing. This is why I come to this forum where I know is guy-dominated... perhaps better to hear from guys how I can improve this situation.

Note: I am NOT looking for any sex outside marriage so please don't suggest me to find it with another man.

Thanks for any advise.